Kismat Disconnection

On the surface, Kismat Konnection is about Raj Malhotra (Shahid Kapur), who is five years out of college and still coming to terms with the fact that he isn't any closer to delivering on the promise he exhibited through his years in academia. This best athlete/student/all-rounder is now a Toronto-based architect running from pillar to post trying to score his first job with his friend and partner Hiten Patel (Vishal Malhotra).Raj's luck is so bad that the powers-that-be in situations like this could consider substituting his mug for the long-suffering black cat as the ultimate symbol of bad luck.

Add to that the fact that his rival (Karnvir Bohra) is an ex-college mate, whose real-world contacts and drive allow him to thwart Raj at every step in his career. So far so glum. Until Priya (Vidya Balan) enters his life one fateful morning and alters the course of his much-promising, never-delivering life.Like the subject of most romantic comedies, the two leads hate each other when their paths cross the first few times. So of course, the headstrong young man doesn't quite see that his luck changes whenever Priya is around, until a dubious oracle named Haseena Banu Jaan (Juhi Chawla ) paints him a picture and sends him on his merry way in pursuit of the girl that passes for his good luck charm.

After he has spent the next few reels pursuing, and getting Priya (who happens to be a part-time activist working against the very mall whose construction contract he needs to win) to fall in line with his tall claims, the never-quite-focused leading man makes the mistake of actually falling in love with her. And that's when the real story of the film begins, in a manner of speaking.Trying to discuss the pros and cons of this film as separates is a task so difficult it is well nigh impossible. The film looks good; cinematographer Binod Pradhan makes the colours pop and Toronto serves as an interesting backdrop to the various hi-jinks these characters get down to.

Safe House is a stylish thriller

Today, the 33-year-old Swedish director Daniel Espinosa is little known outside of Hollywood studio bosses and talents who have seen his crime drama Snabba Cash (Easy Money), which hasn't had a release as yet in American movie theatres. But with the arrival of his Safe House (released today in the United States), a tense, stylish and well acted thriller, Espinosa is sure to be on the A-list in no time.Some viewers might find the new film toplining Denzel Washington, 56, and a much younger Ryan Reynolds (Green Lantern, Buried) a bit bleak and too violent, especially at the end. And in places, the narration is confusing, and you get the feeling there are too many things happening. And, yet, it is one of the most thrilling mainstream movies seen in recent weeks and could do well worldwide.

It could open at No 1 across North America this weekend, though The Vow, targeted mostly at women, could lead the box-office pack. A Valentine Day weepie starring Rachael McAdams and Channing Tatum, The Vow tells a story inspired by real life events. A young married couple sees their lives come to a terrible pass as an accident leaves Paige (180 is a cliche) with amnesia. Leo (Tatum) starts the seemingly impossible task of starting a new relationship with her.But back to Safe House. Here is yet another example of the director of a small film landing a big Hollywood film, and coming out with flying colours, as did such film makers as George Lucas and Steven Spielberg with their second films. Snabba Cash was made for less than $4 million while Safe House, the first English-language film Espinosa has made, cost at least $80 million.

Espinosa did not see the David Guggenheim script purely as an octane-filled thriller but as a drama of inner demons and elusive inner redemption.'I liked that it had a strong pace and was almost a classic American cowboy story,' he said in an interview. 'It's almost like the reverse story from (the Clint Eastwood-directed) Unforgiven. You have the old gunslinger who's been corrupted by the nature of his work and the world around him. Then you have the young guy that believes that he can maintain the sensation of adventure and ethics. There are morals within that world. The old guy sees himself in this kid.'

180 is a cliche

Right from the beginning Sathyam Cinemas' and Aghal Films' 180 (or Nootrenbathu, as it's called in Tamil) is certainly among the most stylish films made this year. Not very surprising, as it's the debut movie of veteran ad-maker Jayendra of Real Images. The production values are brilliant, Balasubramaniem's camera-work is spotless, Sharreth's music is easy on the ears while V Selvakumar's artwork is all cool -- shapes, high-rise apartments and quaint Chennai homes.From then on, it's a happy-go-lucky journey for Mano, who aimlessly drives round in an auto until he reaches a home in T Nagar; makes friends with a garrulous paperboy, runs around the city doing odd jobs like ironing, selling sundal and thus attracting the attentions of a very pretty photojournalist Vidhya (Nithya Menen) who works at the newspaper, Bharatha Mithran.

Then you come down to the story, penned by writers Subha and Jayendra himself. And you wonder exactly how and where it goes, or if it's even going anywhere which ends up being even more of a suspense than the plot-twist itself. Not that the beginning is quite so dismal, even if you're able to guess its direction within minutes: a somber Mano (Siddharth) rises from the waters of the Ganga in Varanasi (the droplets flowing off him most artistically), and watches various families perform the last rites of relatives. He's disturbed about his life, until a young boy apparently gives him direction (and incidentally, his name).

Vidhya, perky and enthusiastic, promptly tracks the elusive Mano down and arrives at his home, asks various probing questions and then, promptly falls in love with him. Her attraction increases, as he never volunteers information about himself and sets up a fund for newspaper boys' education in a jiffy.Naturally, you're given tantalising glimpses of Mano's life: he was, not too long ago, Ajay Kumar, a doctor with the Sunway Medical Centre, San Francisco, where he met the love of his life: Renuka Narayanan (Priya Anand). The two are instantly attracted and enjoy the NRI life, before getting married. In this, they have a solid friend, Sambasivam aka Sam (Sricharan). And then, things start to happen.

Singham is a tiresome film

Or even Devgnporn, if you will. The hero might not show off his privates in Rohit Shetty's new film, but a testosterone version of him strips off all pride to flaunt every ounce of his celebrity status. So we see shots that originate from Ajay Devgn's crotch and shots that linger blatantly on his khaki-clad bottom; we see him peel off his cop shirt in slow, slow motion, either to assault us with rippling biceps or alarmingly prominent nipples poking through a vest.Irony, like sharm, has no room in this picture.The Three Musketeers is poorly adapted. If Devgn was a woman, this would be one helluva exploitation flick. One can't quite say the same when the actor is one of the producers.

We've seen it all before, and Singham's another time machine set up to take us back into the 1980s, Hindi cinema's most ghastly decade. Devgn's a tough, superheroic small-town policeman with a heart of gold and a near-permanent scowl, and he's come to the big city to take on a villain so vile he chokes children he kidnaps with his bare hands.This role is unsurprisingly essayed by Prakash Raj , a fine actor now routinely parlaying heavy-duty South cinema credentials into a career of remade baddies up in Bollywood. Someone has to stand still and play target while Devgn does his best Lady Gaga  impression, claws and all, as the hero grimaces and the soundtrack roars, right? Right.

A word about the roaring soundtrack, then: background score assaulter and general eardrum-rapist Amar Mohile has found his calling. He used to make Ram Gopal Varma's  films trashy by pouring the sound design on so thick our ears bled, but now in cinema that is intentionally and proudly trashy by design, he fits right in and ladles it on merrily, exulting in the lack of subtlety. Earplugs, I earnestly suggest. Two and a half hours of happily hardcore dhishoom-dhishoom will take more out of you than a Metallica concert.A scene from SinghamBut where does it stand on the Dabangg scale, I'm asked. Yes, there apparently is a new measure for tripe conveniently labelled larger-than-life. It's okay, strictly.

The Three Musketeers is poorly adapted

Yet another reimagining of Alexandre Dumas' novel, director Paul W. S. Anderson's version of The Three Musketeers is as awful as one marginally expected. It looks more like a dress rehearsal for a period drama than a film. There are fancy sets and props and state-of-the-art effects but they do not compensate for lacklustre storytelling which becomes a side-piece in most such adventure films.To serve France  is at the centre of The Three Musketeers. On the way to Paris, the country boy D'Artagnan (Logan  Lerman) gets a taste of what he is to expect in this town right off the bat.

He meets a bunch of swordsmen and antagonises them, demanding they apologise to his horse. This is taken from the iconic scene from A Fistful of Dollars where Clint Eastwood  shoots the bullies who refuse to say sorry to his mule.Like the squinting cowboy, D'Artagnan is not a man yet. He hopes to become one soon when he rounds up the three musketeers, Porthos (Ray Stevenson), Athos (Matthew MacFadyen) and Aramis (Luke Evans). Their collective idea of upholding the French honour and self-respect is to reclaim the Queen's diamond necklace. They do a Pirates of the Caribbean  on the skies, taking on their adversaries on specially-crafted airships to retrieve the prized jewel.

Toward the end, the musketeers repeat over a sword-toast that such a cause is "worth fighting and dying for." But that's not the bad news. It's the leeway the director takes to hint that there may be a sequel that scares you the most.Richard Lester's 1974 rendering of the novel (The Four Musketeers) was big in its idea, vision and scope and what it could achieve. Cinematic adaptations of literature usually suffer because in a book an author is blessed with the possibility to flesh out his characters to his satisfaction as opposed to a director who is limited by length and the extent to which he can let the narrative flow.

Vettai is no classic, but it is good fun

Lingusamy is one director who has the commercial formula down pat. And his latest, UTV's Vettai, is certainly among the most appealing mainstream fare he has produced so far. The story is simple. Two brothers, Thirumurthy (played by R Madhavan ) and Guru (played by Arya) are thick as thieves. Only, Thirumurthy is pretty much a wimp and needs his younger brother to fight all his battles, from quarrelling during a kite-flying expedition during childhood right up to adulthood.Guru cajoles his brother into accepting a police post after their father's death and Thirumurthy, after much pleading, accepts the post along with the transfer originally assigned to his father.

The Darkest Hour fails to make an impact And this is where the problem starts. Thirumurthy, who quakes with fear even if someone sneezes, find himself caught in the toils of the local bigwig (introducing Ashutosh Rana ), who, of course, controls the area with his violent ways. Thirumurthy gets tangled up right away, and from then on, the story is a classic mixture of comedy and action, clearly taking plenty of leaves out of the K Bhagyaraj movie, Avasara Police 100.Wimpy cop and courageous brother both run riot, leaving you in fits of laughter and touching you with great sibling sentiment. In the midst of all this are firebrand Vasanthi (Sameera Reddy ) and her sister Jayanthi (Amala Paul), who have no great role to play except pretty up the proceedings.

The first half, peppered with dialogues and humour, moves at a fantastic speed, making you wait on tenterhooks for the rest. The second half has its moments but is considerably slower. Mindless masala takes over soon, leading to the completely predictable bash-fest.Madhavan and Arya have a ball playing brothers. The two are perfectly in sync, playing off against each other. You have to give Madhavan credit for taking up the role of a wimpy policeman who shakes in his shoes, even as he lets Arya play the hero, walking, talking and even fighting in style. The two hit it off perfectly; the only reason you can stomach some silliness in the screenplay is because of their comic timing.

The Darkest Hour fails to make an impact

Stephen Hawking stands vindicated; if only viscerally and through the movies. But in all likelihood, he may not have imagined that alien invasion could make such a crashing bore of a subject in film.In this film, to be precise; one that aspires to seduce the amateur urban horror buff. I am one, not particularly drawn towards this genre, but it failed to make any impact whatsoever and lost, in the process, a potential admirer, a convert for life.It is as if scenes of explosions, widespread destruction, buildings crashing down and humans blown to pieces can pass for all that extraterrestrial forces are capable of and in that, The Darkest Hour becomes another stereotypical take on aliens versus humans.

The fear here is produced from the invisible, the unseen adversary which can destroy earth in a matter of minutes. "They can see us but we can't see them," grizzles a dimwit. New York, London, Paris and Tokyo are already in the grip of alien attack, we are told early on but it is in Moscow that the real action takes place. In the razzle-dazzle of the Moscow twilight, five unexpected allies come together to take on the aliens and the remainder of this picture is spent on how they manage to stay alive in the face of human casualties around them.

Indeed, the idea of an invisible entity and having to contend with such a force merits a lot more than just cheap thrills, as director Chris Gorak resorts to. The aliens are here to raid energy and that's precisely the kind of area that should have been sharply developed with scientific evidence and imaginative skill. What new does The Darkest Hour say than we already know? If the purpose of the film is to send a chill down our spine, why is that chill conspicuously missing? In the scenes where they actually show the aliens, they appear to be the brainchild of a failed, maladroit artist. If it had allowed itself greater scope, The Darkest Hour might have been more endurable. In its present form, it is a serious failure of imagination and a crisis in mid-life creativity. 

Gali Gali Chor Hai is a lame satire

Anchored in the David Dhawan-style of filmmaking, director Rumy Jafry turns a new leaf in this career with Gali Gali Chor Hai, in which he casts a satirical eye on the pressing social concern of our times -- the common man in the grip of corruption.Its timing couldn't have been more correct, with the public mood so intently focused on corruption in the Anna Hazare era.That's probably the only good thing one can say about this film. Otherwise, it's a product of lame writing, inept direction and sincere but ineffective acting. When you do laugh, you mostly laugh at the scene, not along with it. The gullible Bharat (Akshaye Khanna ) is a cashier in a bank in Bhopal, and a theatre actor by passion, who acts as Hanuman  in the local Ramleela year after year.

His father (Satish Kaushik ) wants him to switch from playing Hanuman to Ram some day. His wife Nisha (Shriya Saran ) is a teacher who, convinced that her husband is having an affair with their paying guest (Mugdha Godse ) leaves home and swears never to return.Meanwhile, Bharat's snub to a local politician (Murli Sharma ) puts him in dire straits.Ra.One disappoints New York. To teach him a lesson, the politician's supporters embroil him in a bureaucratic nightmare where he is forced to retrieve a table fan, supposedly stolen from him, by bribing his way through the judicial system.

The joke is it's not even his fan. But he has to prop up his own witness, bribe the cop and even the thief ("Team poori ho gayi," quips the complicit constable played by Annu Kapoor) and gift a cell phone to a lawyer to fight a case that is no case. Bharat's attempt to then get rid of the fan is equally eventful.The motif of the fan, like the umbrella a symbol of middle-class India , could have been worked more successfully into the story but ends up doing no more than amuse you.Again, the Ramleela analogy (Ram is Ravan in real life and vice versa) or for instance, Akshaye's Bharat as a metaphor for India, could have been put to better use. But Jafry seems more interested in touching on these themes for their newsworthiness rather than their inherent relevance to the story. That's why the end sequences descend into a show of jingoism.